Today is 4th of July....and if I was at home it would be a big celebration, but since Im here...and my husband is boring..we are sitting at home today. Today I'm allowing him to be boring without being mean because he goes back to the field tomorrow..for another 2 weeks. So I totally understand why he wants to just be home. On the other hand it makes the holiday more depressing. Last night I went to see the fire works on post..they were amazing! They were REAL fire works, and reminded me of home! It was a lot of fun to hang out with everyone too!
One of my best friends is leaving Ft. Bliss tomorrow...its really hard. I've had other friends leave and that was hard too...but something about her leaving is just breaking my heart. The past 7 months we have gotten sooo close. And now she has to go. The army really sucks sometimes. Its like you make these friends, and they are soo amazing...then they are ripped away from you. Jena's husband is talking about getting out the army next year in September, its crazy. By then we will have been friends over 2 years, and then she will be gone, just like everyone else. Then Carah, she wants to leave asap too..she wants to be closer to family. Totally understandable. Its just crazy.... Gen, Sara, Jennifer, Brandie, Jakin, Sam...all have left already. It's crazy. I've only been here a year and Ive met soo many girls. Justin is re-classing next year sometime....which means we may be leaving here next year. It's so strange..I would be sad to leave, but excited for a new adventure!
So its another holiday, and its crazy because I remember saying last year as I was taking a pregnancy test that was a BFN...you know what I better have a baby/be pregnant by next July 4th. And here I am, empty arms and empty stomach. Then I even started to say that AGAIN this year. and I though to myself stop it! Because when the next one comes around your going to remember saying that. I used to say all the time 'by then I should....or I'll be mad'. I never actually thought THEN would come around. Trying to get pregnant is a pain in the ass, and honestly- Im over it. I'm soo over caring, and being heartbroken when AF comes around. BUT I know that one day, it will be all worth it. Until then though, it royally sucks. A mothers love is so crazy though. Because I know how much I love my unborn babies, the ones I never got to hold, were only there for a short time and how much it broke my heart when I lost them. And then I know how much I love my dog, yes I love my dog sooo much...I can't even IMAGINE the love I am going to feel when I see my baby for the first time, and hold them in my arms. I remember my ultrasound like it was yesterday, I don't think I could have BEEN more excited. I think that is what keeps me going, I know how much I love my babies just in the womb...so knowing that one day I'm going to hold my child in my arms...THAT is amazing. <3
I don't blog about Justin much, I suppose because I dont have much to say. But today I'm going to write about him because something happened recently that showed me how lucky I am. I've alway known that I'm soo lucky to find this GREAT man that loves more then anything...but when things go wrong with others -it really makes you appreciate. I know people thought we were crazy when we got married, BUT its probably because they didn't know how much we actually loved each other. In Sept is going to be 7 years that we have been together. 7 years, thats a long time. We are soo young too. Wow in 3 years Im going to be saying 'we have been together 10 years'. Thats nuts! Also in Sept will mark 2 years married. No matter how annoying he is, or how mad he makes me. I just can't see my life without him. My husband is EVERYYYTHING to me! Hes the funniest person I know too.. (Even though I always tell him hes not funny at all, haha). When people ask him how long we have been together he tells them we have been trying to break up for 7 years, haha. As I look over at him, I can't help but smile. We may have been stupid in high school, and people thought we were nuts to stay together....I couldn't be MORE happy that we did. Just thinking about what my life would be like if one of us would have just called it quits is actually pretty depressing! Now -my marriage isn't perfect by ANY means -don't think thats what Im trying to say, we argue about RETARDED things just as much as the next couple. I really just think we know how much we love each other & it keeps us strong. And the fact that I can NEVR stay mad at him helps too!:) Gosh I love that man too much, I swear!
Well, I'm done blogging for now....I'm going to get ready to go the commissary with Jess & Joel....and Im going to kiss that husband of mine & tell him how much I love him:)
No comments:
Post a Comment