When did I get so weird?

Inability to conceive; Unable to get pregnant
Primary infertility describes couples who have never been able to become pregnant after at least 1 year of unprotected sex (intercourse).
Secondary infertility describes couples who have been pregnant at least once, but have not been able to become pregnant again

Lots of people say you are infertile if you haven't been able to convience for a full year. So techinally I do not fit into this category, but then I believe I do...because next month (April 4th) it will have been one year since I got off birth control. While I did get pregnant, we all know I lost the baby. Plus if you read blogs of infertiles, I couldn't be more like them.

I have been reading this womens blog & her last blog was talking about how being infertile has made you weird. Well I have to say, I have become very weird. I remember a day when I didn't know what cervix mucus was, I didn't really understand how getting pregnant fully worked, I just new you needed to have sex to do it, I didn't know much about being fertile, ovulation, or implantation. I didn't understand really any of it, I kind of liked it that way. And if you have never tried to get pregnant, you probably do not understand either. & THATS OKAY. Haha. Over the past year, I have learned so much I could probably write you a book. Getting pregnant is more of science to me then anything. I learned if you don't have sex at exactly the right time of the month, you will not pregnant. & I have taught a lot of people everything I know (some owe me for getting them pregnant, just saying..they wouldn't know CRAP if it wasn't for me, haha). But if you have ever struggled with trying to get pregnant..you know exactly what I am talking about, the WEIRDNESS.

Do you remember a day when you didn't cry when someone told you they were pregnant, stare down those pregnant women & sometimes give them dirty looks, see a unwanted child and think and maybe even say 'just give her to me, you dont want her anyways' lmao. In the book one of her lines was 'you are relived to see another women carry a tampon into the bathroom'-I never thought of it, but I now am. haha, It's crazy how something like this can take over your entire life, but it can. Ive learned through her blogs that its okay to laugh at how weird we are. And rub it in our friends faces all the great stuff we still get to do that they can't because they weren't infertile, and got pregnant right away. Of course we would do anything to be in their shoes, but its kind funny to see the looks from the pregnant women when you talk about all the horrible things they are going to encounter. Or brag about all the sleep your getting, while they are pushing 3hours! ha, of course as I said Id do ANYYYYTHING to be in thier shoes, however if I can't have some fun in life, whats the point?

<3