8 months!

I know I am like a broke record, every time I blog I say how how it has been first so I will skip this time. I am going to stay I need to start doing shorter updates more often.

Anyways..

Our little miracle is now 8 months old. 8 months, can you believe it? You would think I'd be used to having her around, but nope...sometimes I still look at her and cry because I am so thankful we were blessed with this amazing child. One thing I always remember hearing (sometimes I even found it annoying) DON'T BLINK time will go fast.... now I catch myself saying it almost every day. It really does so fast every day she does something new. 

I don't remember the last time I even blogged but she started sitting up between 5-6 months, which I was very happy about. We are doing baby led weaning and we gave her avocado for her first food a few days after she turned 6 months. She started staring hardcore at food around 3 months, grabbing around 4, and it was hard to keep it away between 5-6 months. Finally around 6 months I let her have a taste (I waited because of the open gut). She ate a little here and there but not much. I gave her food and she really just sucked on it so then it would be one a week if that. About 7 months I started giving her food more often- every couple days. Now at 8 months she gets food every day. I just give her strips of whatever I am eating. We tried giving her ONE jar of baby food because Justin wanted too. I think he was sad that he never gets to feed her so we were at walmart and he asked, so I said fine. We got all all natural stuff she hated it. He offered it a few times and she wasn't having it so we gave her real food and she was good even since. Now she wouldn't let us feed her off a spoon if we tried, haha. I try to get her mashed potatoes sometimes and it doesn't go over so well. I couldn't imagine doing it any other way though. Watching her eat while we eat just looks so natural. 

She starting working on crawling between 6-7 months and finally was full force by 7 months. Shortly after that she was all over the house. Now she follows me from room to room. It is been over a month since she started crawling and I am STILL amazed when she follows me into the bathroom:) She is getting really good a furniture cruising and loves to pull herself up on EVERYTHING, even the dog. Which reminds me -not so sure Bella likes her now that is so active. Alyssa's favorite thing is to pull Bella's ears....adorable. :) Speaking of pulling herself up on things...she showers with me daily now. I know a lot of moms like showers to be their alone time, and believe me when I do take a shower alone it is nice but it does feel really weird (I really enjoy being able to take a long shower and not worrying about what she is doing because she is with me)...anyways back on topic....so I used to drain all the water and leave her sitting in the tub while I dry off, get dresser, brush my hair, and teeth she would sit and play with her toys......now that pulls herself up she decided she is a big girl and can get out of the tube herself. Problem is -she can't! LOL. So TWICE now she pulled her leg up and flipped out..... so needles to say we don't do that anymore ;) 

I don't know if I already say this but our family is about to PCS to Hawaii!!! We leave Texas in just one week...very excited. We will be going to MI for about a month and then will be in Hawaii by the first of the year. :) We are very excited. I am not sure how Justin feels because you know, he talks about his feelings so openly and everything. I know I am excited but nervous. The move is very bittersweet for me. 

I know this wasn't too long...but I gotta run, I have to get ready to go to your going away party<3 div="div" nbsp="nbsp">

PS I also think I should try and figure out how to get pictures of my beautiful baby on here for the next blog. 

Controversial Parenting Tag

There are blogs going around called controversial parenting tag going around, so I thought I would chime in since I am very opinionated :) I don't know how to tag people, so if you read this then I am tagging you to do one as well :) 

The Topics: 
Pro-life Vs. Pro-choice
Baby Wearing
Circumcision
Adoption
Baby Piercing
Breast Milk Vs. Formula
Spanking
Co-sleeping
Home Vs. Public Vs. Private Vs. Charter Schooling 
Vaccinations
Medicating Children
Cloth Vs. Disposable diapers 
CIO Method

Everyone has their own views -here are mine.


Pro-life VS Pro Choice - I am very pro-life. I have recently started understanding a little more the pro-choice side, but I am still very pro-life. I believe that life begins at conception and we shouldn't have the choice to take that life away. The only time I am on the fence is for rape cases.. and even then I personally would never have an abortion regardless of rape.

Baby Wearing - I really don't understand why this is controversial, but here are my views on baby wearing. When I first had Alyssa I knew nothing about it. I was lucky enough to be given an ergo that I hung on to. I also had a bag sling (awful). I didn't know there was a right or wrong way to baby wear but there DEFIANTLY is. For instance -crotch dangler are NOT okay. Other then that, I am a big baby wearing fan. I used to use a stroller with Alyssa when she was an infant but I found that I would end up pushing the stroller and holding her in my arm regardless. With my next baby I will use a sling from day one and I will not purchase a stroller. I now wear Alyssa EVERY WHERE. We actually just went to the zoo about a month ago and we brought the stroller just in case, she sat in there maybe 5 minutes. So I am a BIG baby wearing fan I think EVERYONE should do it, but I am not going to judge you because you use a stroller. 

Circumcision - This is obviously a HUGE controversial topic and I feel very strongly about it. When I was pregnant with Alyssa the topic came up a few times but I didn't know anything about it, to be honest I didn't even realize what happened durning a circumcision. After I had Alyssa I found support online for breastfeeding and the pages talked about circumcision a lot. After a while of reading the debates over and over again I noticed the pro-circ people would say the same things and they were ALWAYS debunked they ended the debate with 'well it is my child, my choice. The anti-circ crowd had so many facts, I couldn't believe it. I decided to research it. One I did I realized right away I was against, and I couldn't believe all that I learned. I also watched SEVERAL videos of the procedure being done because I figured if I couldn't sit through them without cringing I shouldn't do that to my child. I probably have watched 5+ videos now (because people always say it isn't like that in real life) they are all the same and I cringe every time. It is unnecessary and not to mention all the wonderful functions of the foreskin ;) I don't understand how anyone could do that to their prefect baby boy after knowing the facts. I am not going to go into it too much because I could write a book, but leave a comment if you have any questions. (If you are wanting to know where to start your research the whole network is a great place to start. Over all, if we have a son he WILL remain intact. 

Adoption - I am in favor of adoption, I think it is wonderful and would love to adopt an older child. I really don't know what else to say about this topic other then being pro-life I would much rather you put your child up for adoption then have an abortion. I know a lot of friends who struggled to get pregnant or stay pregnant (myself included) so yes I am defiantly a fan of adoption! I think it is amazing. 

Baby piercing - This one gets pretty ugly too. When I was pregnant with Alyssa I was planning on when to get her ears pierced, I was on that same Facebook page (milkie mamas, in case anyone is interested) and they were discussing how using guns to pierce ears isn't ideal. The debate got pretty heated and I read all the comments. I looked into piercing with a gun, talked to my mom (who didn't do ours as a baby) and I realized that it isn't my body to modify so I was going to let her make the decision. I wouldn't say I am an anti-ear piercing but I don't really see the point. I loved that my mom made us wait because it was such an awesome day, knowing what I know now I am thankful that she let us chose (that wasn't why but still lol). 

Breast milk VS formula: Obviously if you follow my blogs you know I am vey pro-breastfeeding. Breast is best, and that is that. My mom always told me about the amazing bond and told me I should breastfeed. I didn't do much research or anything while pregnant I just knew it was something I wanted to do. Since having Alyssa I have realized just how amazing breast milk is. I plan to let her self-wean. She has had formula in the hospital and NICU (I am STILL not happy about that). Knowing what I know now for MYYYYY child if I ever had to stop breastfeed or couldn't breastfeed my next baby I would use donor milk, goats milk, or make my own formula. Formula would be a very last option. That being said: I will say it again if you CHOSE formula I think that is selfish, my opinion, you don't have to like it. I know there are a lot of misconceptions about 'not being able to breastfeed' actually only 3% (either 2 or 3) of moms actually can't breastfeed, but I believe that WAYYY more think they can't. 

Another huge one SPANKING: I believe in gentle discipline. I won't say I will NEVER spank Alyssa, but I don't plan to nor do I ever want to spank her. The way I feel is that if you hit another adult it is abuse but if you hit a child it is discipline? And why would I teach my child to do something by hurting her? I just don't understand that concept of that.  I believe in discipline NOT punishment (yes there is a difference). Justin is pro-spanking but I am working on that one ;) He knows how strongly I feel about not hitting our child, so I hope that he will come around like he is come around on the other topics we disagreed on. 

Co-Sleeping - I am very pro co-sleeping and also pro-bed sharing.  A lot of people don't realize there is a difference. Co-sleeping is with the baby in your room, I believe that everyone should do that for the first couple months. It makes life so much easier and then the baby doesn't have to be alone. Bed-sharing, is just what it sounds the baby in your bed. I am a huge fan of that too. I brought Alyssa into our bed just a few days shy of two weeks and I am very happy about that decision. We plan to let her stay in our bed until one of us is uncomfortable, more then likely when she tells us she is ready to leave. We just LOVE having her in our bed. I do think if you are going to sleep with your baby you need to look into the safe ways of doing. 

Schooling: I think homeschooling is great but I don't feel like I could teach Alyssa everything she needs to know, if we did chose homeschooling I would get a tutor for sure and do the co-ops. I don't really have a strong opinion homeschooling/private/public schools, and I have no clue what charter schooling is. i think whatever you chose is great. 

Vaccinations: I am probably going to get judged for this one, whatever. :) I am not pro or anti vaccinations. We do vaccinate Alyssa because my heart tells me too. I have looked into them a little and I understand why people whose not to do them with their children, but for Alyssa I feel like it is best we get them. We do selectively vax and split them up though. 

Medicating children: I am not exactly sure what this means. I am thankful for medicine because sometimes I think it is needed but I believe it is way to over used in this country. I hardly ever give Alyssa medicine, I try natural things first. We use a amber teething necklace that I swear by, so need for medicine for teething. 

Cloth VS disposables: I am a huge cloth diaper fan, it is way cheaper, cuter, no chemicals and better for the environment ..what is not to love? I personally would hate if I had to go back to disposables. My main reason for using cloth was the price, everything else is just an added bonus. I don't care what other people do with their kids I do get annoyed listening to people cry about money but they refuse to cloth diaper. So, don't complain to me I won't pitty you. lol. Oh and I am the laziest person on the planet and I don't find them any harder then disposables. 

CIO Method: Yeah, so I am totally against CIO. This includes the ferber method or any other kind of 'training'. Personally I feel like nothing says I don't care about your needs like CIO. My personal opinion is that anything over 5 mins is cruel. Our children are only little for a short time, no one said parenting was easy. Also, I hate crying myself to sleep so I would never do that to my child. I want her to know that I will always be there for her no matter what her needs are. 


So those are my views, it doesn't mean I won't be friends with someone if they have different views because I get along with almost everyone. :) Oh and now I know why I don't blog anymore it took me an hour to write that haha. I will be posting an updated blog about Alyssa, who is 8 months old, btw..very soon<3 span="span">

6 months!

I haven't blogged in....well gosh I dont even know how long.

So much has changed. Alyssa is now 6 months old. She is still EBF. She's sitting up by herself, she still falls over from time to time but she has learned how to stop herself from falling. She can sit up for a long time by herself though. She is starting the movements to crawl but I don't think she will be 'going' anytime soon. Even without crawling its amazing how much she can get around. Last time we went to the doctor they just did a quick weight check (since we split up shots its not a full doctors appointment every time) she was 17.4 lbs. WOAH. Its amazing she weighted 7 0.1 oz when she was born...now shes 17.4? Time really does fly. She is still sleeping with us, and I won't be moving her out of our bed anytime soon. We've decided we will let her leave when she is ready. We LOVE having her in our bed!:) She still wears the snuza, and yes she will for a while. Our poor little girl got her first little cold last weekend, we were at a marriage retreat when she started to get sick. She was up ALL night and it was horrible for her, I felt so helpless. The next day we decided to leave the retreat and go home. I didn't want to have to drag a sick baby out to all those classes. Good thing we left too because that entire day if she was awake, she was crying. It was horrible:(

Pretty much everything that I was going to 'expect' the first 6 months, was wrong. Everyone is always so quick to tell you about the bad things they forget to tell you about the good. Of course we had sleepless nights, all day nursing sessions, a sick baby, teething (oh yes she has two teeth), the nights/times when I called my mom crying because I didn't know what to do....but seriously I hardly even remember that stuff. All I really remember is how lucky we are to have her. I do think time is going too fast though, I really truly feel like I just blinked and I had her. It's so amazing how she went from this little tiny baby that just laid around all day to this BIG baby that moves all over;)

A lot of people have been asking the question 'When will you try for another baby' and truthfully we don't know. We have talked & we agree that we do want another baby BUT that we are going to be content if we are never blessed with another child. We talked about trying earlier then we are ready just because it may take some time to get pregnant again, but we decided we don't want to rush into anything. Im not on birth control, but trying to try ovulation & periods is a joke. So we are 'whatever happens happens'. (but we do pull out lol). When we do decide we are 'ready' we aren't going to do any stressing over it. Honestly though, I really want another baby so I have a chance to give birth naturally. There are so many things I feel like I missed out on with Alyssa's birth because I just wasn't educated. But its okay, 'when you know better you do better'. Hopefully things will be better next time:)

I don't know if I wrote about this or not.... but we are preparing for our first PCS to........HAWAII! Justin is 100% excited. I am about 80% excited, 10% scared shitless & 10% to leave Texas. I'm nervous  *mostly* for just the whole moving process. We did get the whole Bella situation under control and Im sad but relieved to say that my mom will keep her for the first year. Justin is deploying next summer, (which scares me to know end) so we figured we would want to go home for a really long visit while he's gone. We wouldn't be able to do that with Bella, so we will leave her with my mom & bring her back around Christmas time next year. I'm also nervous about housing, Im praying they have a house for us shortly after we get there. And totally nervous that they are going to lose or ruin some of our stuff. It really is just small worries but I know we will be JUST FINE! And seriously who can say they got to live in Hawaii?? Not many...  I already found some awesome groups for cloth diapering, baby wearing, AP parenting, selling pages...& much more. So Im sure I will find friends in no time (no to mention Gen is going there, and I have some other friends there as well).

Over all, life is perfect. <3 p="p">

update on Alyssa - I can't believe shes 3 months!

Our amazing daughter is 3 months old. I can't even believe it. Heres a little update on her..

First off all she sleeps A TON! She wakes up about once a night to eat, sometimes twice. I just put the boob her her mouth and within 5 mins shes back to sleep, so I think its more of a comfort then actually hungry. She still sleeps with us so it makes it pretty easy, and she never has to cry or even fully wake up. Thats super helpful lol. She's starting to be awake a little more durning the day, but not too much. Sometimes I wish she was up more lol. I spent A LOT of time with her in bed cuddling though. I could get a lot more done durning the day, Ill be the first to admit it....but Id much rather be cuddling my baby!<3 She's starting to not be latched on as much, and she doesn't like when I hold her like a baby anymore:( Really child your 3 months old -I should be able to hold you like a baby for much much longer! She is starting to show some interest in her toys that I hand her, but usually just for a split second. She still loves her bouncy seat and has a blast playing in there. Its nice because since I don't put her in there a lot its like a treat LOL. She uses it to shower and so I can go to the bathroom..thats about it. We use her bumbo seat for dinner and so I can clean up the kitchen. She likes to sit in that too:) Her swing...ehh its hit or miss. I use that for about 10 mins a day if that...usually so I can take the dog out haha. Her activity mat she does like and she will play for a little bit. But her fav thing ever is just to lay in bed and have me talk to her. She's all smiles!

I met a lady at the doctors office who had this really smart 3 year old, she was telling me I should start reading to Alyssa every single day..I was reading to her just not every day. After seeing that amazing girl and talking to that mom I decided she was right, and really more bonding time can't hurt? Now I am kind of obsessed...I grab a handful of books (usually between 5-10) and I read them to her every night. She seems to really love it. She's been getting back to being pretty fussy in the evenings again so I use the gliding chair to rock her & get her calmed down...then I read to her till she falls sleep!

We have moved bath time to the bathtub instead of the sink. One day she was pretty fussy so I decided to bring her bath sling and put her in the tub with me...(I can't stress enough how much I LOVE baths) it calmed her right down, and I realized how easy it is to just get into the bath with her. So every since then I just take baths with her.

She rolls all over now, from back to belly, back to back. Its so cute to watch her roll haha. The first time she went back to belly I was like HOLY CRAP I thought you weren't supposed to do that for months  LOL. It was really exciting..proud mama moment<3

She's usually a pretty happy baby, and shes getting MUCH better about the car. She hardly cries, and when she does I can *usually* get her calmed down. I think the more comfortable carseat helped A LOT. We still do baby wearing and she loves it sometimes other times she wants to get out and look around. I started putting her in her stroller when we go some places, she really likes sitting in there too it seems. Its so nice to have all these options lol.

She's growing up so fast, its so amazing. I LOVE being a mom, its the single most amazing thing that as ever happened to me. I get asked a lot now that shes getting older if I am thinking of putting her in her crib or bassinet (basically getting her out of our bed). Justin and I pretty much agree we will know when its time, and its no where near time. He still wakes up quite a few times out of a dead sleep and looks over to make sure shes breathing...(I don't wake up nearly as much anymore but the snuza has a lot to do with that, I more wake up and worry its turned off). Now that we have more room in the bed, I see no reason to get her out. She'll leave when shes ready, we make a lot of jokes about how our kids will be teenagers still sleeping with us. Justin just said something about us having 6 kids and a dog in our bed haha ---we are NOT having 6 kids;)

Another new thing she started is crying when I leave her (to go to the gas station because thats the ONLY place I go alone, I won't even run to walmart lol) uh-oh. I left twice and both times she scared the whole time=/ He thought she was hungry, but since the gas station is seriously a min away by the time he thawed the BM, warmed it up, put it in a bottle I would have been back...so he just waited....she wasn't hungry -either time lol. I knew because I just fed her right before I left and also because the second she saw me she stopped crying the second time, and the first time as soon as I grabbed her she was good. I felt really bad for him hes like 'what you don't love daddy anymore'. Its just because I am with her 24/7 and I am usually the one to calm her down. So I said we needed to start working on that, letting them get her more when shes crying. It seems to be helping:) Yesterday I went to the gas station and she did great:) He said hes realizing he has to keep her busy the whole time so she doesn't notice I am gone, by walking around with her, talking to her, singing to her. It felt great to come home and NOT hear her screaming last night! She's warming up to him (side note she did amazing with him until the stupid field training)<3 Although the moment when your baby is upset and only wants you feels great LOL.

Alyssa and I are going home in a few weeks, I am SO excited! I can't even wait for everyone to meet her/see her again.

:)))

What would I have done if I couldn't BF?

Because I am so PRO breastfeeding I get asked quite a bit.... what would you have done if you couldn't  BF?

Well first off let me start out by saying I was very determined to breastfeed. I told myself from day one I would do EVERYTHING in my power to breastfeed. I wanted Alyssa to have 0 bottles 0 formula. Of course we all know she landed in the NICU so plans didn't go my way. HOWEVER...I know for my next baby how to make changes. First off, they gave her formula because her sugar was dropping -without even asking me. Chances are at the time I would have just said yes, but next time I know that I WILL bring a sign that says no bottles no formula, I trusted the nurses when they told me they wouldn't give to her without talking to me-and they did. Not to mention, they say they 'need it' but they really don't. I have seen countless friends get told that & they refused the formula and guess what -no issues. I guess thats a scare tact from hospitals? Idk doesn't make much sense to me. But that was my first lesson learned -don't trust people. Second, when she was admitted into the NICU I stressed over and over and over how important it was to BF.  Those 3 days she got pretty much all formula. I pumped but because it was just colstrum I didn't get much. She wouldn't eat from me, because as soon as I put her to the breast she fell asleep -she was very comfortable my arms. I didn't realize I got get donor milk (from someone I don't know, or a friend). Thats my second lesson learned...if I have have another nicu baby I will find someone to give me breastmilk. You live and learn...

With that being said -I got VERY lucky with Alyssa because when she came home we did have some issues, but I had a really supportive mom who told me "she might miss one meal, maybe even two but she will NOT miss a third -don't you dare give that baby a bottle". I couldn't get her to latch, and neither one of us was getting it. Long story short we finally got it. With no bottle needed. Im excited to say that she hasn't had formula since we left the NICU, and I was able to donate all of it to other moms in need:)

Now back to the question -what would I have done? For me, breastfeeding was everything. So I if I couldn't have EBF I would have felt guilty or more felt like I failed -I know I would have - but I also know I would have done EVERYTHING in my power to at least give her SOME breast milk. I have watched mothers struggle their entire BFing relationship and STILL make it past 6 months...most have to supplement with formula. I watched moms struggle with not enough milk, no latching, no milk, pumping issues, using a nipple shield for months on end...so I learned A LOT. I know that it would be really hard for me if I didn't get to EBF or BF at all but I wouldn't be offended when people talked about how wonderful it was or how they think formula is the most awful thing ever (yes people believe that) because I know that I would have given it EVERYTHING I had. I know I would have cried like hell, but then realized that I did everything humanly possible to BF and that I didn't go down without a fight. -That I couldn't feel guilty for.

I am however planning to find a friend(s) when I get pregnant next time that already knows the plan and would be willing to donate her milk to me if I ever get into a situation that I need it

So if you are a BFing mom that didn't make it, or had to supplement remember are still amazing for trying and giving it all you had. Remember you did your absolute best and no one can ask for more<3 Don't let people make you feel guilty!

Why I post the things I do...

I have been wanting to write this blog for quite some time now...but Ive been pretty busy. Alyssa is sleeping now so its the prefect time.

I want to explain somethings.

After having Alyssa I found a ton of awesome parenting groups/pages on Facebook. A lot of them are breast-feeding support. Its wonderful to have online support because SO many people are against BFing in public or just in general. And there are lots of questions about BFing -is she getting enough, whats wrong with her latch, why isn't she eating, are their enough diapers, can I take this med and so on and so forth. BFing can be really hard, esp with people commenting 'I could never do that, so your baby poops like 6 times a day ew, shes always attached why don't u just bottle-feed, she eats to much'...so I found support online. The more I read about BFing the more proud I became of me doing it. When I first wanted to BF it was because my mom said its better for the babies and she loved the bounding time. She always said she didn't know if you could bound with your baby without BFing because she never didn't BF lol...then she saw Justin with Alyssa...and she realized YOU CAN bound the same. She said it was so amazing for her to watch, she loved it<3 Well, the more I read the more passionate I get about the subject, and the more I want to educate people because it IS hard and so many people give up after a short short amount of time because they just don't have the support or the right information. So many times I hear that someone didn't BF because their family didn't so they didn't know where to start. Or they didn't know its healthier. So THAT is why I post things...plus I want people to see how amazing it is because it IS hard at the beginning -sometimes REALLY hard. Thats not to say that I think a mom who choses formula is any less of a mother then someone who BFs, because I don't. I used to say that I thought it was horrible when a mother doesn't even attempt to BF...and that still makes me kind of sad ---BUT then I realized that some people don't have a mom who told them how amazing it was. Would I have chose to BF if my mom if wasn't for my mom -Ill never know. So how would they know if someone didn't educate them. So THAT is why I post things...I am not saying 'oh I am better then you'. I don't think I am a better mom then anyone.

With all these BFing, natural parenting pages came a BIG topic that I wasn't ready for: circumcision. As I was reading all the comments about it, I just skipped over those statuses because 1) I had a girl. and 2) I didn't see the problem with it. Well the more I went on these pages the more I realized people are SO against routine infant circ...and I wanted to know why. So I decided to do some research. What I found shocked me. Im not going to go into a big long note of why you shouldn't do it. Ill just say Id LIKE you to research it before you do it, and watch a video. JUST because its always best to make informed decision. With that being said: I would never judge someone who circ there son.. you are doing what you think is best for your family. As I am doing what I think is best for mine. I wouldn't say that makes me better then you by any means. I am just not like that. BUT I do feel like I need to post things on Facebook because how can people learn if no one is teaching them? I have already had a few people message me and thank me for posting because they had no clue. I can't just let go of that...I can't. Same with BFing I have had people say I saw your Facebook posts and it made me want to BF....thats amazing. I am just pretty thankful for those groups because if it wasn't for them we would have circ our son without giving it a second thought =/

Abortion is another big one -I am posting because its something I feel super strong about. If I can change at least ONE persons mind its worth it.

And last but not least carseat safety is a huge one. If you don't chose to extended rear-face thats FINE. But I am not going to stop posting things about it...heres why. When I was pregnant the subject got brought up and Vicki explained how it was safer. I thought she was nuts...because honestly it didn't make sense to me. How was it safer? We were in the car with another friend and she agreed with me. Vicki was trying to explain (and getting pretty heated haha) and we weren't listening. This was before I had seen articles ALL over Facebook explaining how much safer it is. Over the next few weeks Vicki made it her mission to change my mind...one night we were at my house and shes like well you really listen to me and watch this video. She changed my mind....and I seriously thank her because if it wasn't for her I would have turned Alyssa and 1...and its just not as safe.

So, in conclusion -I am not posting these things to make you feel like an asshole for doing them. Or to say I am better then you, or saying I am judging you for your choices. I am posting because I feel strongly about the topics, and I want to inform others. If you don't agree thats fine, I still love you. Theres tons of things other people post on Facebook that I read and think what an idiot, buttt guess what everyone is different...and theres going to be plenty of times we read each others stuff and think, shes an idiot. Doesn't mean we can't still be idiots together haha. Its kind of like pay it forward, I learn something I want to pass the info on. Doesn't mean I am judging you for choosing something different. I have tons of friends who are against epi, induction, any meds durning labor really, c-section...they post things about it ALL the time. I had an epi & I was induced (water leaked) do I get offended...maybe for a quick second but then I realize they are just trying to inform people of the info that THEY learned. Its not a personal attack on me haha. Oh and FYI Alyssa is 2 months old and I already find things I did wrong...I didn't know. Ill do better with the next baby, its a lesson learned.

Sooooo remember -I am not judging you. And I am no where near the perfect mom -although I am so close its scary -LMAO jk!;)

Attachment parenting!

Attachment parenting. It seems to be the topic of discussion lately. I can honestly say I didn't know anything about it before Alyssa was born, and I am kind of glad..heres why..


When I was pregnant I wanted to breastfeed...it was something I KNEW if I couldn't do, I would try EVERYTHING and if I couldn't...Id be highly depressed. When I found out they gave Alyssa formula in because her sugar was dropping dramatically, my heart sank. I wanted to cry right then and there...everything I read says NO BOTTLES NO PACIS AND NOO FORMULA. She was just a few hours old and they already broke the rules. I was crushed. When they brought her back to me and she took to the boob I felt much better...I had quite a bit of trouble in the hospital but the staff was amazing support (it was me not her having issues lol). That night Alyssa did A LOT of crying, any time we put her down... I wanted her to sleep with me in my bed but Justin said no way. I would fall asleep with her in my arms & he would wake me up and say no put her down. He even offered to stay away & hold her so I could get some sleep....but he was DEAD set against her sleeping with me. He was way to worried. But MY natural instincts wanted my baby in my bed with me. The next day when they took my baby to the NICU I felt my heart breaking into a million pieces...with every bottle of formula they gave her I wanted to die...I tired to nurse her but it just wasn't working all I wanted she wanted was to sleep in my arms, it broke my heart.

Fast forward to when we brought her home...she was in my arms A LOT I spent a lot of time TRYING to get her to nurse, working on the latch, trying to keep her awake. Anytime only of us wasn't holding it just just didn't feel right to me...but I kept hearing over and over again that you don't want to spoil her so hold her for a few weeks and then put her down a lot...you'll regret if you don't. So my mindset was AS much as I wanted to hold her, I must not allow her to become spoiled. I started to notice that even when she was just sleeping I didn't want to put her down. Again it was those natural instincts kicking in.

A couple days before she turned 2 weeks old we had big problems....she was cluster feeding. But not only was she cluster feeding she would fall asleep on the boob, Id lay her down & less then 30 mins later she woke up screaming...at the time I didn't think anything of it..I just thought she was super hungry (and Im sure growth spurt had a lot to do with it) Well I spent 3 nights in the row on the couch (two of them crying) because my baby wouldn't let me sleep...she would fall asleep and Id let her fall into a deep sleep but as soon as she was out of my arms she was awake. It was REALLY hard. On the 4th night I couldn't take it anymore I told Justin she was sleeping in the bed with us, he was SO against it...begged me not to roll over on her...it was a nightmare. I didn't know what to do. But I followed my gut which said put that baby in your bed. That night we slept great--and almost every night since! I got a lot of shit about how I would kill her, and how Ill never get her out of my bed....but Justin and I agreed we didn't care how long she was in our bed, we would deal with that later. I did a lot of research about co-sleeping and how to do it safely. I got the toddler guard rail, the snuza..and I felt great. (Btw Justin said she could start sleeping with us when she's 1 bc then its not to likely for us to kill her, so he clearly doesn't care about her sleeping with us haha). Since then everything has been perfect, theres always the fear that I will roll over and I don't want to say I won't because Im not going to jinx myself...but we both sleep amazing and are much happier...she LOVES to be by momma what can I say:)

So remember when I said that Im glad I didn't know about attachment parenting before she came? Well the reason why is because then I might have wondered if MAYBE just MAYBE the research and talking to other moms put an influence in my head....but since I did everything before I even know all about it, I can honestly say I just followed my mothering instincts. and for THAT I am thankful! I already had the ergo carrier long before I learned about baby wearing, and I knew I would use it...I just didn't know so many people did wear their babies:) I was told A LOT that you shouldn't pick your kids up for every little cry, but I have since learned that I can't just let her cry. In the car she does, and its horrible. I hate it. Besides, soon enough she's not going to want to be cuddled or loved on so I need to enjoy it while I can. I used to think Id want to kill myself if my child didn't let me put her down..but now I have realized I WANT to hold her. Of course I do want her to play on her play mat, sit in her swing & use her bouncy seat but she does all those things. While Im cooking dinner she comes in the kitchen with me and sits in her bath seat..when I shower she sits in her bouncy seat...where ever I go I bring my little love bug with me! Its perfect!

You may think I am crazy, and thats ok!:) You do whats best for your family, and Ill do whats best for us!  In the end following your instincts is it what is best!:)